i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Randomize
