Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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