I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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