I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
