Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize