she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
