Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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