Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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