If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Randomize