I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Randomize
