Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
she peed on how many people?
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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