You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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