I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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