Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
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