my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize