i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
