Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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