i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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