Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
