I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Four minutes until I can fart!
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize