Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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