the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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