jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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