my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize