why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Proof That Kendall Jenner Is The Queen of Cannes
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
The 21 Worst Ways People Have Been Dumped
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?