just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
