its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize