And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
