Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
