I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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