i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
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If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
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But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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