yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I miss vodka workout Fridays
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
