i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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