Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I don't deserve a penis
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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