yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
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