I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
My pussy is not your playground.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Randomize
