Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Randomize
