do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
