3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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