ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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