I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
I want her autograph on my taint
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
