Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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