Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
