it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
It's blow job season.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
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