Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
