I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
