just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
