She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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