i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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