Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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