Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
you will always have a special place in my vag
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
