their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
your room smells of hookers.
And success
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Randomize
